We are who we attract and there lies the problem. It’s only a problem if as managers, we don’t appreciate or understand the value of diversity. Managers are typically working on important issues and big problems. Solutions for these problems require broad thinking or a broad viewpoint. Diversity is the key.
Consider the 4 social styles: Expressive, Driver, Analytical and Amiable. If we spotlight the expressive style (for example) we see a group of big thinkers with grand vision and grand thoughts. Tasked with a big project or problem to solve and surrounded by other expressive types, this group will create excitement but execution will be poorly defined and success a moving target. Similar examples can be made with the other styles.
Each style benefits from the others. When working as a team a balance of these social styles will create a powerful force. The analytical types will carefully study the issue. The amiable types will ensure effective teamwork and the driver will facilitate forward movement by “making critical decisions” for the group. Balance is the key.
As a manager you may accept the argument for diversity or the value of diversity but before you can succeed in creating this critical balance in your team you must understand yourself beyond your “style”. There are 4 skills of personal development that will help you accept the value of diversity and it starts with self-awareness. What is my talent? What is my style? What is my contribution? When am I in charge? When should I take charge? What do I need to grow personally and professionally? How do I get better? You can’t objectively evaluate others until you can objectively evaluate yourself.
The 2nd is self-mastery. Before you can control others, you must be able to control yourself. Self-mastery is the ability to control your emotions and direct your energy to a situation NOT based on how you feel about yourself or what you deserve. Dealing with diversity to grow in strength and skill is a powerful talent to acquire. A Chinese philosopher once wrote that “mastering others is a strength, mastering yourself is a true power.”
Awareness of others is the 3rd. Successful managers win the hearts and minds of their team. Although there are some rare and troubling individuals who lack the capacity for empathy, most of us have at least some capacities to identify with another person’s feelings. However, people vary considerably in the level and intensity of empathy they possess.
For empathy to be appropriately experienced and expressed, you must first be “aware” of the other person’s feelings and concerns. Some people are just plain “oblivious” to the signs that others are experiencing certain emotional responses and that those responses might in fact be connected to behaviors on the other person’s part. Awareness also requires sensitivity. Being sensitive to the wants, needs and desires of another is highly correlated with the ability to put yourself in their place and understand what they are feeling.
Lastly mastering relationships. This skill ensures that communication which fosters trust is in place. Active listening, reinforcement of key messages and follow through on promises or commitments are critical to relationship building. Before you can successfully build alliances within your team or manage conflict you need to establish the trust that comes from the open-ness of communication.